Room(mate) for Improvement

Dear Stephanie,

I live in a suite of 6 girls total and my roommate is great. But one of the other girls who lives in the suite is particularly disgusting with her bathroom habits. She also happens to come a much different culture and religion than me. I don’t know a lot about her or her culture. I want to approach her about her unsanitary habits but I don’t know how to go about it without being insensitive, because what if these restroom habits are part of her religion? How should I talk to her without causing a problem?

Sincerely,

A Repulsed Roommate

Dear Replused,

My gut reaction here is she is probably just a gross person and it doesn’t have anything to do with her religion. Cleanliness is next to godliness after all! But seriously, I did some research on the 3 major religions over the past few days and followers of these religions  are all supposed to be VERY clean. However, to play it safe do some research on her culture, religion and customs to be sure yourself. Learning about her customs may help you decide on how you should approach her.

Regardless, of what you learn, gross is gross and you will still need to talk to her. I do think she has no clue she is being unsanitary. She think’s what she is doing is totally ok. So you can’t be mad at her for that, but you have to try and teach her, for your own health and sanity. Approach her privately, not with the 4 other girls in your suite around, and be as non-judgmental as possible. While embarrassment is an effective way to get someone to change their habits, it is also a good way to ruin a happy and healthy relationship in the future. You talking to her one on one, I think, will provide enough embarrassment to get her to change her behavior, but not so much that she would be insulted. She will be glad and thankful that it was not in front of a crowd.

If anyone has a different idea or approach to dealing with a gross roommate please leave a comment below! I would love to hear your input.

With Love,

Stephanie